bullying....long, but definitely worth the read....

this has been a tough week for us so far here in the reisner household!

it all started monday night after i dropped chris off from basketball practice. john started to cry and said, "mom, you have to do something about david." david is a kid that moved here a few years ago. he is a whole year older than john, but in the same grade. david was on john's aau traveling basketball team 2 years ago. tom wanted to help him get acquainted with 'good' kids in our school. so i asked john what he meant by that. he proceeded to tell me that today in the classroom, david walked over to him, pushed him down, and started hitting him-hard. john got up, but david pushed him back down. john stayed on his stomach and david began hitting (and kicking, we found out later) his back. yes, there were kids in the classroom. no, there was no teacher in the room. she was in the hallway making sure kids were coming to class instead of goofing around in the hallways. the problem is--is that no kid in the classroom would go get the teacher because everyone is afraid of david. they were telling him to stop, but wouldn't go get the teacher. finally, david quit, and john got up and quietly went to his seat. he never told the teacher. why? because he was afraid david would hurt him worse.

afraid. in a school that has a zero tolerance for bullying rule. as a parent, that makes me sick to my stomach-literally.

then john told me this isn't the first time david has hurt him. the last time, he put his hands around his neck and tried to choke him. sigh.

so, as you can imagine, i was furious. i went right to the computer and emailed the teacher and the principal.

my first email tuesday morning was from the teacher: " i am just sick. this will be taken care of first thing in the morning." then later at work, i got a call from the principal letting me know that john and other kids from the classroom had been called to the office, and yes, john was telling the truth. i never doubted him for a minute. he went on to tell me that david got in school suspension and will have to take bullying classes and how to treat others with respect. this is bull. how many times should one kid be sent to in school? david has been sent numerous times-numerous. all for hitting/picking on kids randomly. (john just happened to walk thru the door at the wrong time.) the problem is, is that david's mom doesn't care about his actions. at. all.

later in the day on tuesday, we had a basketball parent's meeting. david's mom, of course, wasn't there to hear the first thing that the coach said, " we have zero tolerance for bullying on this team. if it happens at practice or in the locker room, your son is off the team." after the meeting, i walked over to the coach (who i don't know at all), and he told me he had gotten an email from the principal and assured me that absolutely nothing would happen while john was on his watch-he would guarantee it.

what puzzled tom and i was why david was allowed at basketball practice that night. he had violated the good conduct policy, so why didn't he get an unexcused absence from basketball? why? because you have to be suspended from school for any extra curricular consequences. that again is bull. you are telling kids that they were bad in school, but they can still do something that is a privilege? i have an email in the principal to hopefully get that rule changed. that is teaching the kids absolutely nothing.

tuesday night we had another email from the teacher telling us she felt like she should apologize. she had let all of us down, especially john. you think? right off the bat, she had john tagged as a bad kid-mostly because of the rest of the boys in his class. we had an incident where she didn't trust john and gave him a zero on a quiz (that he still strongly denies and will get very emotional when we still bring it up). so, john told us that he didn't say anything to her because he didn't think she would believe him. we plan to share that information with her at conferences tonight.

so, john is still very afraid to go to school. david is out of in school. david's friends are telling john that david is going to 'face plant' him for telling and the friends are calling him a tattle tale. john is convinced that david will hurt him again. but, john has assured us that he will tell us right away if something happens again. and our lawyer will be on the school steps so fast to get that kid expelled it won't even be funny.

see, it has been a reeaaallllyy long week.....